A is for Adoption

Pop Quiz

Ok folks. Here's your chance to win big prizes my continued admiration.

The question: What is pictured below?

A. A paper-mache breast that Theo made in preschool.

B. A special mix of playdough, hand lotion and water that Theo sculpted into a mountain onto his bedroom wall.

C. A model volcano that Theo created for his dinosaurs.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And . . . the answer is . . . B! Did ya get it right??

Talking about race

On Saturday Jeff and I attended an incredible workshop at our church, based on the documentary "Traces of the Trade: A Story from the Deep North." The film tells the story of a prominent New England family that is discovered to have been the largest slave trading organization in the country. It shows 10 relatives from the family (from all over the country; some first cousins, some 3rd or 4th) taking a 3-week journey that follows the route their ancestors took to trade the slaves: from Rhode Island, to Ghana, to Cuba, back to Rhode Island. We watched the film and then had a very intense discussion facilitated by one of the women from the family who was in the film. 

It was such an opportunity to be open, ask the tough questions, give the hard answers. There were about 20 blacks and 20 whites, and we talked about everything from white privilege, reparations, institutionalized racism, etc. With trepidation I expressed my fears about raising Theo, and received so much sincere support I cried. I know that keeping my eyes, ears and heart open is the most important thing I can do for my son, and I know that many people love and support us. I feel so lucky.

For more information: http://www.tracesofthetrade.org/

Four times the fun!

All of the sudden, in the blink of an eye, we have a four-year-old. And I feel 100 years old. Theo is seriously wearing me out. Not only is he speedy, he has quite a temper. For the last month, his favorite thing to say when he gets mad has been "You're not coming to my birthday party!" with a comical scowl on his face. Now that his birthday is over, we've explained that his threat is meaningless. His response: "But I'm going to be 5 soon!"

He hits, he screams, he throws his dinosaurs, he splashes water out of the tub . . . of course, he also hugs, gives smooches, tells me he loves me, and helps me sweep the floor. (Never mind that the reason we have to sweep the floor so often is because of the food he drops/throws.) Overall, I am pretty disappointed with my parenting skills. I love him so much but it's hard for me to remember where he is developmentally -- it doesn't work to try to reason with him. Time to go back to reading "Raising Your Spirited Child"! Trouble is, when I get in bed I can't manage to read more than one page without slumping over and drooling. Sigh.

 

Snowballs and sledding

We took an overnight trip up to Tahoe this week. As expected, Theo loved the snow (he's been begging us to go since he started watching Frosty last month) . . . but as you can see in the photo, he didn't love it when his face got all wet! 

The day after Christmas

Yesterday was the big day. Theo was thrilled that Santa brought the "spinosaurus that moves" that he wanted (thank you, eBay). Our house was warm and cozy while a storm raged outside. Lots of wine and Christmas cookies were consumed (especially by yours truly). And our families got along. It was really wonderful. In fact, this was a truly wonderful season -- lots of fun activities and social gatherings. I enjoyed every minute. But now I'm ready for it to be DONE.

It's weird. As much as I love Christmas, when it's over I don't want to linger over torn wrapping paper, dirty dishes and empty stockings. I want to put it all away, and quickly. So today I will be taking down the lights and ornaments, that I just put up so carefully 4 weeks ago. Time goes on. 2011 is around the corner.

Christmastime is here!

Dashing through the treefarm,

With a boy who loves to play,

Over the mud we go,

Laughing all the way!

 

Candy canes in hand,

Making spirits bright,

Oh what fun it was to choose

Our tree and put up lights!

 

Theo the Artiste

Last week I worked my butt off transforming my office/studio into Theo's bedroom. I decided that now that Theo is almost 4, he needs a bigger space (with more room to house all his toys that currently clutter up my living room). So I moved out all my office furniture and STUFF, then repainted the walls, then Jeff and I huffed and puffed and moved Theo's furniture downstairs (not as easy as it sounds)! So, what does Theo do on his second day in his brand new room? Decorates the wall. With many many bright colors. Very very large scribbles. And guess what? Washable pens are NOT completely washable. Lesson learned. The pens stay downstairs!

Being thankful

Turkey Day was full of F's -- fun, friends, family and food. Besides eating myself into a coma, I really tried to articulate what I'm thankful for. Things like:

- An amazing relationship with Theo's birthmother and his brother; I know they'll be part of our lives forever

- A wonderful partner (Jeff) who wanted to take this journey as much as I did, and who thinks about all the implications and challenges as much as I do

- Our health

- My vast network of friends, who have stuck by me even though I'm far less available than I used to be

And there's so much more. I have to ask myself: how did this ol' girl get so lucky?

 

Articulating my worries . . .

This blog post expresses my fears exactly about what the world has in store for Theo when he is no longer small, adorable and bashful. Yes, we live in Oakland, but we don't live in a bubble. 

 

http://www.losangelista.com/2010/11/what-will-getting-older-mean-for-my.html

The Missing Months

Yes, it's been ages since I posted. In some ways a lot has happened, in other ways nothing much. Theo is growing by leaps and bounds--he is taller, smarter, more verbal, more physically agile, and more challenging. Here are a few highlights of the past few months:

July: Went once again made the trip to New York, to see Jeff's family in Scarsdale, to put Carol's ashes to rest at their old family farm, and to enjoy our fourth trip to fabulous Mohonk Mountain Home. Here's Theo swimming with his cousin Evan . . .

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sept: Monterey Jazz Fest!

Oct: Trick or Treating with "Tiny" (from Dinosaur Train)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Theo also painted some jack-o-lanterns:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And, as of 2 weeks ago, Theo is now riding a bike, with no training wheels! Woo-hoo!